Cruising for a bruising

08 Dec 2007- South Africa- In the wake of the indecent sexual assault charge brought against gay icon Somizi Mhlongo, Neo Motlhala protests against violent homophobic attacks that seem to be on the increase.

NOW that Somizi Mhlongo’s arrest for indecent assault and allegations of whisky, sleaze and seduction have been splashed all over the tabloids, we need to review the threat of homophobia.

Pornography may create the impression that a sexual “catch” is as simple as buying cellular airtime and the ­seductive moves that will end in a lay are as easy as punching in the right digits. In real life, however, the script can turn nasty, especially if your “catch” is homophobic.

I will not concern myself with the ­details of the encounter between ­Mhlongo and the complainant but will look at the general issues highlighted by their brief “liaison”.

For those who don’t know, the thrill of a chance sexual catch is exhilarating.

Person P meets total Stranger S. Person P invites said stranger into his personal space, be it a car, a home or other private place. As Person P tries to negotiate a sexual transaction, Stranger S explodes in a fit of anger. He becomes clearly homophobic and wants to harm you with words or with action. And this is where it gets dangerous.

The first danger could be shaming and blackmailing.

I raise this issue because many homophobic individuals use it as a weapon against gay and bisexual men (both closeted and open). Homophobes believe gay activity is shameful and scandalous – especially if other people are made privy to one’s shenanigans.

Many gay and bisexual men have found themselves in unenviable post-coital positions where demands for money for silence are made to prevent trumped up charges of rape. Sadly, many succumb and pay to prevent the drama and so-called scandal. However, the proud and resolute face the charges.

The second danger is the threat of a physical crime, and it’s more worrying. Taking a stranger into an insecure space is risky. An insecure space is any space where help is not close at hand, allowing an attacker to commit a crime.

Black gay professionals have become prime targets for theft. “Bane mali la bantu (these people have money)” is the expression of a common myth.

If it’s not the wallets, cellphones and jewellery, it is the car, household items and other valuables that attract petty thieves and thugs. Tragically this is accompanied by threats to life and limb.

A leading financial analyst and a friend were recently charmed by two men in Diepkloof, Soweto, in a plot to rob the analyst of his luxury car. After a drinking session at the local tavern, the “hunks” persuaded him to drive them to another spot. On a dark and isolated road near the Orlando power station the analyst and his friend were threatened with a gun, hit with beer bottles and forced to stop the car.

In the ensuing assault they managed to escape while the thugs took the car, only to abandon it after torching it.

Others have perished in brutal bloody murders. The story of Professor William Papo from Pretoria was covered widely in the media.

Others include a Johannesburg banker popular in the gay community killed in his flat, ex-television presenter Maurice Mtshali bludgeoned to death in his apartment and a teacher killed in his Rockville, Soweto, home.

A group of Pretoria gay socialites known as the Mahotella Queens Trio have much to say about a jump from a balcony to save their lives.

Although I refer only to gay men, the dangers of picking up strangers applies to all people, particularly single women and even, as anecdotes suggest, heterosexual males.

The alleged events in Mhlongo’s Lonehill home highlight the dangers of cruising.

In our quest to be a progressive and civilised society, attempts to demean, shame and harass legitimate gay and lesbian activity must be disparaged and frowned upon.

Furthermore, we must be responsible and take care of ourselves. A pick-up may be easy, but the sting may be devastating. Let’s keep it safe!
 

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